You will always put your press, your publicity, your public image first. When will anyone look up from their phone when they talk to me? I don't understand why i'm not important enough to anyone for them to stop scrolling their facebook and look at me and actually talk to me. Was I too ambitious to think that in this life, in this world, I could actually find someone who's willing to put me before their social media? Will I always come second to their social media? Maybe no one thinks I deserve it. No one thinks i'm important enough, least of important enough to put their social media on hold even for a second. I was foolish to think someone would give up their social media account for me. Then maybe I don't want to have to hold out for someone, or hope that someone will care about me. Especially if I know they will always care about their social media more. Relationships are a lot of work. Trust has to built on both sides. Maybe I don't want to have anyone in my life, so that I don't have to compete with facebook or whatsapp for their attention.